We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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