Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
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whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
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Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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