You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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