it wasn't lemon gatorade
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
