Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Randomize
