it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
