wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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