I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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