i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Randomize
