i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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