kristin has been a bad kristin
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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