Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
