But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize