I wanna passion pit in your ass
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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