I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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