she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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