Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I am mentally ready for anal.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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