I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
