member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
