She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
