Me. At least after what I've been through.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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