Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
