Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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