I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
