If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
How does one acquire holy water?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
