hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Well I just put wine in my tea
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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