Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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