Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
