kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
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Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
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i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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