well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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