She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Randomize
