Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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