You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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