Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
