smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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