On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
