You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
