I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
