**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize
