He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
