She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
