already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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