Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
