it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize