writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
