After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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