so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
