bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
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