can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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