woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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