Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize